- Clarinda Brandão
Is 'Ghosting' The New Way Of Dating
It seems we have entered a world where online dating is the norm and organic meetings seldom exist. But what baffles me most is the new trend "ghosting". If you haven't heard of it, it's basically where you chat with someone for a bit, maybe go on a date or two (some even make plans to meet again) and then suddenly they disappear. No follow up. No calling to let someone know they're not interested. It's bad enough we have to rely on the lack of real communication with text, now it's all about "ghosting". That's lacking communication altogether. What is happening to dating! Now a days people's attention span and focus is minimal. Always looking for something better - and dating has taken the brunt of it. Chatting with multiple people and swiping away when they're sitting at home bored. Let's be honest, we've all done it, waiting for a bus, sitting in traffic or during a terrible movie at home - we log in and swipe or browse (depending on the online app you've downloaded this week, because we all know there are hundreds of them out there now). Even if you're interested in someone, you're still looking. We are all guilty of it. Which I feel is by far the worst way to make an authentic and genuine connection. (No wonder there are more break ups and disconnected couples). ... And now to add to the already damaging experience of dating we have GHOSTING? Ugh. Is it really the end of real connections? Let's take the time to focus on one person at a time. If they intrigue you enough to want to meet, then I think they deserve your undivided attention (it's only a couple of days, people). You're not missing out on anything - but you might if you're too busy looking around and not paying attention to what's in front of you. Second, don't just disappear, let them know you're not interested. So, don't , "I'll update my profile and hope they get it". "I'll ignore their texts". "I'll respond in one-word answers and hope they clue in" or "I'll block them. Easy!" - that's the coward approach and if you really liked someone, would you like that done to you? Woman/Man up! Dating shouldn't be this difficult.